Eileen came to her hypnosis session complaining that daily events annoyed her, particularly at work. She was frustrated when her boss didn’t understand that she was working way beyond her job description. Her boss, and eventually others in the office, got on her nerves. There was yelling in the office and unfair accusations.
I asked Eileen to stop defending herself and stop feeling angry as we talked. I asked her to put her energy into figuring out the boss’s motivation. Eileen wanted to keep her job, she just wanted to tolerate it without an elevated stress level. The solution is to wonder why the boss behaves in that difficult manner. Eileen must refrain from actually reacting to her boss. I suggested Eileen try to figure out why the boss does what she does and why the boss has such wrong ideas.
When you develop the habit of analyzing and not personalizing you do not feel so unhappy, you do not feel victimized and you do not feel misunderstood. Instead, you feel calm; happiness follows.
The hypnotic suggestion that I offered Eileen is:
Think about your boss as a pathetic person who is intimidated by your superior ability. When people get on your nerves, analyze, don’t personalize.